In other words, I'm not reacting to regrets. I am, at some level, envious.
I've been mulling over this topic for a couple weeks now, specifically why marriage (regardless of who's) is suddenly evoking such an emotional response in me. And I've discovered that I've still not resolved how I feel about all of this. (Case in point, this is the third or fifth draft of this entry.) Instead, I've decided to state what I do know/feel:
- I am dating, in a very non-traditional sense, a woman whom I love, unequivocally.
- I am happy with, excited by, and anxious about all this relationship will bring about.
- I am, in my moments of uncertainty, distracted by traditional relationships, and the comfort of their familiarity.
It just doesn't fit neatly into the Facebook "relationship status" drop-down menu.
Portlandia Prevails... and Evolves.